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European Engagement

September 15, 2010

The countdown has begun. Less than 5 weeks. Translation, I only have to sling overpriced coffee to pretentious boobs for 35 more days. I mean, can’t people just order a nice simple drink like mine, a Venti Americano with 2 pumps of classic, a dash of soy, and served at a cool 140 degrees…no? Okay, okay, getting off topic. I should go ahead and tell you right now though, if you’re looking for any sort of actual or traditional travel advice, you might want to skip this entry and stick with Greg’s much more relevant, substantial post from yesterday…and a few days ago…and, ya know what, just click on all the ones posted by Greg and you’ll be good to go.

As it states in my bio, which if you haven’t checked out our bios you should (and then tell all your friends about our blog), I will be the sole single on this adventure.  To begin with, this is not a role that I would even consider taking lightly, but now that we’re blogging…well wow!, the stakes have been raised. I have a responsibility –  to you, and frankly as a soon-to-be starving artist, to myself and that empty hole I call a bank account.   Europe is the continent of romance…okay that may not actually be true, but for the sake of our trip and this blog, we’re going to say it altogether in an airy French accent, “Europe is the continent of (purr out the r) Rrromance.” – Eh.Not bad.You’ll get it in time, I’m sure. –  On a less, or more, depending on how you look at it, magical note, Western Europe is also the home to…money.  Royalty, jua de vive, you know, the good stuff!  That makes my mission simple then: I have 8 weeks to land a wealthy woman/man (it’s Europe, no one has to be picky), bring them back to America, and carry on as a financially well-supported arteest. SO, while Eric and Greg will no doubt be out looking at the Eiffel Tower and gawking over the Colosseum, I’ll be hunched over my BBerry in internet cafes, scouring the various dating sites with dollar signs in my eyes. I understand that this doesn’t stir a picture of excitement in most peoples’ mind, but if you take a moment to think about the possibilities, I think you might question your own daily itinerary the next time you travel.  I mean, when mentioning this to my mother the other day, she lectured me about “no way to explore the world” “waste of a once in a lifetime trip”, but she wasn’t fooling anyone, I could tell from the look in her eyes, she’s holding out for that mother-in-law penthouse on the Upper East Side!

Anyway, why I really wanted to tell you this, other than to prepare you for the experience to come, was to get feedback. I’ve thought of a million angles to work in my quest to be a kept-man, but what are your thoughts? Is there anything you think I should definitely do or avoid on my way to the bank altar?

2 Comments leave one →
  1. Sarah permalink
    September 16, 2010 1:12 am

    Darling! There is no need to scour the personal ads. Let me give you a quick crash course in the european dating pool. It’s all about the nod, the pause, the look and the lean! Practice, I promise results! First, you start with the head slightly tilted towards your prey, i mean towards your target, I mean towards the intended? Then when you make eye contact pause, glance for just a second away and then BAM! Give the come hither look. When they approach, slightly lean into conversation. It says “I’m interested, not that interested, but come talk to me because I’m fascinating.” No one can resist the steps and soon you will be swooning. It’s the accents! They get you every time! You know what they say- there is no better way to learn a language than to date a native speaker. I suggest you learn French, Italian, Dutch, Spanish, and re-learn English. European is the continent to fall in love. The scene is set, the players ready, they are just awaiting the star!

  2. September 16, 2010 5:52 pm

    I have read lovely blogs from Greg and Colin, but I am waiting to hear from the other guy ( aka Eric ) Rumor has it he is working on something fantastic! Can’t wait to see that one.
    Mama J

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